How One Became Two

I met J-Dog at a point in my life when I was seriously done with men. As anyone who’d made it to their 30’s and are still single, I’d already had a lot of relationships. A lot of fun. And a LOT of bullshit. I was finally at the point where I felt good about being single, good about being me, and well, not wanting to rock my own boat.

And then we met. We met accidentally, and immediately, I thought "I want more of that, please." And so we went out on purpose. I had talked myself into believing that I wanted to hire him for a position at my work – he was getting his Ph.D at the time, was very transpersonally focused, and I kind of wanted to hire a guy for this particular gig. So we talked at length about it and he decided to come in for an interview. During the interview I blurted out "if you take this job we won’t be able to date." Pushy bitch. He stopped short for a minute and said, "maybe I shouldn’t take this job after all." See, we knew. But I didn’t know I knew, so I took him for what had been my all-purpose dating game for years – a road trip to baja. A terrific road trip to one of my favorite spots in the world usually meant we’d hang out for a while. If the trip didn’t go well, if the cat didn’t understand what I loved about the shithole hotel and the cheap beer, then that spoke volumes too. The interesting point about our trip, though, is that I’d only known him a week before we went. Talk about speed dating, people.

While my actions obviously dispute this, I really tried to resist J-Dog emotionally. I was having a good time in life and I didn’t want to give that up for potential heartache down the road. Uh huh. Keep talking.

We had an incredible time in Mexico. We both felt like we’d been found – like THIS is what we’ve been waiting for, that our collective bullshit finally had a purpose, like we’d arrived….it’s almost cheesy enough to be a celine dion song, and I hate that bitch. But our love made me feel courageous. It made me feel powerful. And we had a hell of a lot of great sex.

We moved in together six months after we’d met. We knew it was crazy, but we didn’t care. We were fearless. We set up this little home and started our lives, not without some decent arguments, not without some ups and downs, but we did it. We were remarkably in love and while we didn’t know where we were headed, we knew we were on to something.

And then I got pregnant. But that’s the stuff for Pt. 2.

Jen is an urbanmoms.ca member and blogger (visit her blog One Plus Two here). Check back next week and the following week for parts 2 and 3 in her story. What do you think? Share your thoughts below in comments.