Bring It On, Gossip, BRING. IT. OHN!!!!

Hi Gorgeouses!

I’m changing the format here for technical reasons. From now on, you’re going to get some funky headlines as an opening intro and the bit about moi and that cheaty little monkey down below — after the flower. Trust me, you’ll LOVE it. It’s HAWT.

I just had a GNO with Ali Ms. Fabulous and THE Jen Maier (how cool am I?!). Well, it was actually a GNI — girls-night-IN — because we were at my house…and the monkey was hanging out with us a lot of the time (cheaty little thang…). Anyway, it’s late, and I’m still run down from that nasty bug I’ve been fighting with all week. But, I’m going to do my best to BRING IT! So, you better….

CHECK IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ANNA NICOLE SMITH DIES, AGE 39

Speechless. Her whole story lately is just so sad. Her son dies 3 days after her daughter, Danielynn, is born. Then there’s this whole fight over Danielynn’s paternity. Then she…dies? Leaving behind Danielynn? With Howard K. Stern? Who will inhearit her late husband’s $1 billion estate? Apparently, Anna Nicole was found "unresponsive" in her hotel room. She was rushed to the hospital and intubated there to no avail. I’m actually saddened by this. Not only is it just plain sad from a "humanity" standpoint, but it’s also, like, the end of an era. I guess it’s only when someone dies that you realize what they mean to our culture. She REPRESENTED scandal. She’s, like, the ICON of blond bombshell scandal. I guess we’ll always have Britney….
For more on this sad news, check the article at People.com.

ISAAC BREAKS UP WITH BRITNEY…VIA CELL PHONE!!!

Now, what’s worse? Being dumped via cell phone, or…sticky tape a post-it? Both are bad. He called her while she was in NYC. Here she is (in above photo) partying it up hard with JC Chasez — that dude from In Sync. She bumped into him at some bar there and they drank. Then she’s said to have hooked up with a male model….
Photo and scoop, with thanks, c/o Star.

JESSICA LOOKING GORJ!

I’m LOVING this brunette ‘do on her. So natural and exoticish. Makes her eyes look less bulgy. She looks totally gorj. This is a GOOD look for her!
Photos, with thanks, c/o X17 Online.

TERI HATCHER HANGING WITH GEORGE BUSH, SR.??

Well, she’s certainly dressed appropriately. Look how happy George is! He’s, like, in heaven. But, what the hell are they doing hanging out together. Like, how weird is that?! Apparently, they had lunch. I just find this so weeeeeeeeeeiiiiird! She does look great, though.
Photos, with thanks, c/o Flynetonline.com.

MISCHA AND CISCO BREAKUP OVER NAKED PARIS-EXPOSED PICS

Why is this girl SUCH a bad dresser? She canNOT get it right. Honestly, she’s skinny, but her legs could use some tonage — so, why the miniskirts! …never mind the hat? and…vest!? …over that mini schmata!? What’s going on there. We don’t know for sure if Mischa broke up with her boyfriend because of the naked pics of him that were published on Parisexposed.com. He says no — that she’s over it…they are 6 years old. But, whatevs, Mischa’s single. I hear Justin Timberlake’s available?
Photo and scoop, with thanks, c/o X17 Online.

IS ANGELINA JOLIE ANOREXIC?

You’ve all noticed how thin Angelina’s gotten lately. You saw the backbones jutting out of her near-backless Golden-Globes dress….She was all tatoos and bones. Well, sources say she weighs a mere 118 pounds, which is nothing for her 5’7" height. Apparently, Ang doesn’t eat much on a normal day, but, she’s been eating even less since her mom died. Very sad.
Photo and scoop, with thanks, c/o Star.

HAYDEN PANNETIERRE SHOPPING…AGAIN

Look’s like Heroes is paying Hayden a fat paycheck — no surprise there…. ‘Cuz this girl is ALWAYS shopping. At least lately. Last week, she shopped till she dropped with Kristin Cavalleri, and this week with her mama. Sweet. She’s perty.
Photos, with thanks, c/o Flynetonline.com.

ELLEN!!!!!!!

Okay, how adorable is she? Here are some highlights from the issue — it’ll be available in Canada Feb. 23.

• On making the cover of W: “I know what this magazine is. … It’s a fashion magazine. For me to even be asked to be on the cover — it’s huge.”
• On not wearing a dress for the shoot: “I just don’t feel comfortable in it.”
• On fashion? I usually wear Jil Sander,
  or I wear Marc Jacobs, or I wear Viktor & Rolf…. I love Raf Simons,
  but I didn’t know he was even doing the [Jil Sander] collection. I like
  Neil Barrett. I love clothes, so when I wear clothes, they’re usually
  somebody’s. You know, I’m not wearing Kmart.
• Do you think that’s what people think? Whenever
  Portia and I are on the red carpet, they’re yelling out for her to tell
  them what she’s wearing. But nobody cares [about what I’m wearing]
  because I have a suit on, even if it’s a Gucci suit. That to me is
  frustrating, because I put effort into getting ready too. But I guess
  it’s not as important, and I’m not as dressed up somehow. I also feel
  myself more of a person than a gender. When people show me clothing
  that seems very, very feminine, it’s hard for me to embrace that,
  because it just doesn’t feel like me…. It was fun [for the shoot]
  having somebody do that to my hair, and do that makeup. But would I
  want to do that every single day? No.
• What are you wearing to the Oscars? Everybody’s
  sending me stuff. Gucci sent me this amazing package with all kinds of
  different designs and different fabrics, in a beautiful box with my
  name engraved in gold plate. I picked some fabrics, and they’re making
  me something. Zac Posen made me a gorgeous tuxedo. Viktor & Rolf is
  making me something…. I wasn’t planning on changing because it’s just
  different suits, but I may do it, because I’d like to thank them all
  for making me stuff, for wanting to do that.
• On having kids: “Ellen would carry,” girlfriend Portia de Rossi says. “That will never happen,” Ellen replies.

LOVE HER!!!!! Here are more pics from the shoot:

Photos and excerpts from interview, with thanks, c/o Just Jared.

Okay, so, what’s worse? The cell phone breakup, or the sticky-tape post-it breakup (a la Sex in the City)? What are your thoughts on the sudden death of Anna Nicole Smith? I’ll certainly keep you updated on the results of the autopsy. Of course, the phrase "drug overdose" is being thrown about all over the place. Let’s face it, that’s very likely…if not obvious.

Any other thoughts? Speak to me in the comments! Don’t be shy. Commenting’s fun, really.

Come visit me at The Cheaty Monkey. I experienced something yesterday that I’m ready to share.

LOVE! xo Haley-O