BRITNEY GOSSIP EMERGENCY!!!!!!

Hi Gorgeouses,

We have something very serious to discuss today: BRITNEY!!! I like to keep the language clean here, but no other phrase conveys my reaction better than (and I leave it abbreviated) WTF!!??!!?? Bald head? Bald? Head is bald. I.e., NO HAIR. Bald as a door knob. Bald as Sinead O’connor was in her rebellious years. Only Brit doesn’t have those gorj massive doe eyes that you could swim in to make it work. No. Brit looks like (here I go again) sh-t.

Also on the agenda today: Brad Pitt’s latest magazine photos, Jennifer Lopez booed, Nicole Ritchie charged, JT warns Britney….

check it!!!!!!

BRITNEY!!!!!!!!!

 

Apparently, Brit checked into rehab in Antigua after a family intervention last week. She checked out within 24 hours. She was so desperate to leave the centre that she booked a seat in the last row of the coach section on a last minute flight from Miami to Los Angeles. Soon after she arrived home she went to a hair salon after hours and shaved her head. Then, she got herself some tattoos (one of which is a pair of lips on her right wrist).

The hairdresser actually refused to shave Brit’s head (probably for fear of being sued, or fans’ death threats, etc.) — so Britney did it herself. I don’t know…is anyone thinking post-partum depression? Because this is, like, psycho behaviour already.

Some say she did this to rebel, others are saying she’s symbolically shedding her past. I’ll, of course, keep you posted on anything I hear.

Check this vid — you’ll love it — lots of deets here:

Here’s what Rosie O’Donnell had to say about Brit on her blog (and I quote not because I’m a fan of Rosie’s — I happen not to be — but because I know some of you are and others of you will find this interesting):

brittney shaved her hair
out out damn spot

in the movie in my mind
she says yes
help me
and i do
somehow
we both connect – get through
she is saved

somehow so am i

the bottom for a celebrity
has too much cushion
money buys detachment
no responsibility

many moms –
of kids in ur sons class
want to shave their hair off
and get a tattoo

they dont because they cant
noone is there 2 watch the kids
what would the neighbors say

plus
the pta meeting
would be humiliating
on many levels

real life
can save u
sometimes
u have to – no choice

super rich 24 yr olds
who have spent half their lives
in the FAMOUS-SPHERE
mary kate and ashley
miss britt
same same same

i want them to come live with us
somehow
thinking there is healing here
it worked for me

u can carve out something real
there in pretend-ville
real life awaits
as perspective shifts

compassion aids healing

Photos of Britney, with thanks, c/o X17 Online.

JUSTIN TO BRITNEY: STOP DRINKING!

This past Wednesday, Justin was named the best international male solo artist at the Brit Awards. In his videotaped acceptance speech, he said: "Everyone have a great night. Stop drinking!…You know who you are. I’m speaking to you. You are going to
get sloppy. OK! Magazine is going to say something bad about you." We await Brit’s response. Something tells me, though, that Brit has a lot of other responding to do before she gets to Justin….I’m not going to wait up.

JENNIFER LOPEZ IN TEARS AFTER AUDIENCE REACTION TO LATEST MOVIE

Jennifer Lopez attended a screening for her new movie Bordertown at the Berlin Film Festival recently, and the audience BOOED when it was over! Jen was in tears. It certainly won’t make her feel better that these pictures make her look like crap — there’s a booger in her nose in that first picture. Poor beautiful girl. She just can’t pick a good movie, can she? Recall (or don’t) Gigli…? But, she usually does take better pictures.

BRAD TOPLESS IN INTERVIEW MAGAZINE

Still got it! Hottness!!!

NICOLE FACES POSSIBLE JAIL TIME

Nicole Ritchie was charged with a DUI on Friday for the December incident in which she was arrested for driving the wrong way on the freeway. Since she also had a prior DUI conviction back in 2003 (which would make it twice within 10 years), she faces a possible sentence of 90-365 days in jail, a fine of $390-$1,000, and suspension of her driver’s license. Oy veh….

So, I made it through the sick days unscathed (knock on wood!). I didn’t get the flu that both Josh and the monkey suffered through for days. Thank you thank you thank you! Hallelujah! BOOYAH! But, I am severely tired, and out of shape, and in need of a new wardrobe….Sigh, want to hear more about that? Check it — at The Cheaty Monkey.

Leave a comment! Talk to me, Gorgeouses! Let’s talk about poor Britney…. EVERYONE’S DOING IT! This just in…: BRITNEY’s been admitted to ER for psychiatric evaluation. Good. Let’s hope she stays there and figures things out.

xo Haley-O