11 08/23/2012 parenting

How Do I Get My Kid To Stop…..

a. Biting his fingernails. There are so many of my habits that I hoped Will would not pick up on.  You know.  Things like re-watching the same movies over and over again (fail); eating entire bags of chips in one sitting (fail); and drinking too much at high school dances (tbd).  The other one was the nervous picking of the fingers.  Unfortunately, he’s started with nail biting.  And now that there is nothing left to bite, he’s picking.  If you could see how damaged my nail beds are from twenty plus years of this, you’d see why I’m so anxious to get this habit dumped.  Help!

b. Picking his nose.  I get that every once in a while, you have to clear the mine.  My kid though?  He’s working 24-7 on that sucker.  That finger is constantly up there.  On a good news front, it’s not automatically going into his mouth…although where the hell are those boogs ending up then.  Not. Going. To. Imagine.  Any tricks to curbing this habit beside a straight jacket? (which would solve point A as well!).
c. Biting Other Kids.  Thankfully Will is out of this one but I’m asking for a friend.  No really.  It is for a friend.  Her son is a biter.  And he’s really, really good at it.  Which would bode well if he was gnawing on bones all day, but unfortunately he’s gnawing on his classmates.  Will was a biter too but I honestly can’t remember what we did except chanted ‘biting is for food and not for friends’.  He still likes to say that one.  Any advice?
d. Wearing a Diaper.  Our big fat summer of awesome adventures has almost come to an end…one more mini-trip this weekend (wahoo!).  So, it’s time to do the night time toilet training.  Do you have any tips? We’ve had one success – total fluke but I think that’s because  he didn’t drink that much.  He wants to do it so I think he’s ready.  I’m just not positively anticipating the endless wet beds…OR the fact that half the night, he ends up in my freaking bed.

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So experienced moms and dads – help me out!!! (oh and my ‘friend’…:)).
**Here is my boy with neither his finger in his nose, mouth or sporting a diaper.  Total peace.  My fave part of it…my mom’s necklace peeking in the corner of the picture…just now noticed it.***
  • Sara

    Aren’t those awesome Id? Great reminder though – I’ll get one for my bed! I’ve used them on Will’s since he went big boy – mayb3e I should layer them…so awesome!

  • Idas

    Sara,
    not sure what waterproof liners you are going to want .
    But holy, we spent a huge amount until we found a solution at Ikea.
    (we layered too, one of our girls can hold water like a camel, the other like a hummingbird, biology is a major factor for us).
    As eco as I tried to be, I could not bear the crinkle of many of the eco branded liners.
    So we bought Sleep Country super thin, amazing waterproof liners but we hellish expensive. ($100 each !!!! x two beds x 2 each plus 2 x each trundle beds for sleepovers…..wtf!!)
    Well, turns our that Ikea has an similar super thin liners.
    Oh yes: http://www.ikea.com/ca/en/catalog/products/70152783/
    $25. Yayayay!
    Plus, the make them for King size for $39.99 thank god because sometimes when the kids are sick or whatever, they sleep with us and boy, did it save us many times with a sudden nausea or worse.
    Hope this helps!
    Id

  • Sara

    Kath – I love the idea of the layered sheet. Perfect – I’ll combine it with the towel etc.
    He is the one that wants to try so I’m following his lead. We had a dry diaper this am even with drinks before bed last night – I think I’ll start with pull up this week and then move on to nothing next week.
    Thanks for all the advice guys!

  • Sara

    total oral fixation…he sucks on everything and gnaws on anything that goes in his mouth. The problem is – they’re starting to bleed he bites them down so much!

  • Kath

    This is interesting as I just took part in a thread elsewhere online about the nail-biting thing. So my thoughts are thus: can YOU stop biting your nails? I know that in 40-odd years, I have tried everything and haven’t managed to crack that bad habit, so I would be inclined to say this is a battle you just might not win. Luckily my girls didn’t pick up that bad habit from me, but they do crack their knuckles (guilty on that score too).
    Nosepicking – my younger one did this. Plus, she liked to eat the boogers (sooooo disgusting). I just got on her case literally EVERY time I saw her doing it. “Get a tissue!” “Don’t eat it!” I told her that other people think it’s gross and it’s okay to do it in private (well, not eating but picking) and eventually she got it. But she was probably nearly 5 by the time she stopped.
    Biting – never a problem with my kids, but I agree this is a bad one. I’d tend to agree that immediate redirection and repeating “biting is wrong” or whatever works (I like your line, reminds me of Bruce the Shark: “fish are friends, not food”). Your friend might have to get right in there when her little guy is around other kids and really watch him to see what his triggers are so she can redirect before he gets to the point where he might bite. This is going to be harder if he does it at daycare, etc. Wish I could be more helpful!
    Bedwetting/night training – I agree with Sara. As a bedwetter myself (I wet the bed until I was 10), and having had a bedwetter of my own (my youngest last wet the bed about four months ago and she’s 9) I know that it is purely physiological. Some kids’ bladders develop later, as does the physiological trigger to wake fully when you need to pee in the night. I say give this one time. Lots of thoughts on this one to set Will up for success – I agree that there should be no drinking after dinner…that one helps A LOT. I used to try waking my kids and making them pee when I went to bed, but that was really hit or miss so I stopped it.
    In the end, though, true bedwetting (as opposed to convenience-peeing in the pull-up just because you can, which some kids undoubtedly do) really is physiological and not behavioural, so I don’t think anything you do/don’t do will change the time at which Will night trains. Until then, if you don’t want to use pull-ups (or get tired of paying for them), try this trick: I used to put a fitted sheet on the bed, then a plastic sheet, then another fitted sheet. That way, if my daughter wet the bed, all I needed to do was pull off the first sheet and the plastic sheet, and there was a clean sheet ready underneath. Laundry and re-making the bed could wait until morning, and the mattress wouldn’t need cleaning.

  • Donna

    After Arielle was potty trained I kept the diaper on at night but it was always dry in the morning. Still, taking that next step to getting rid of the night time diaper was nerve-wracking.
    I limited her drinking, had her pee before bed, and put a towel under her sheets. (I know there’s a better method for protecting the mattress!) Anyhow she never had an accident and eventually I got rid of the towel.
    This past year at school however during the day she didn’t make it to the bathroom and peed her pants. So, accidents can still happen.

  • Sara

    Re: bedwetting…. Firstly, I think that you may not want to pressure him too much. Who cares if he wets the bed? Some kids are not physiologically ready to stop wetting the bed until much later. I had a very relaxed attitude about it, it didn’t bother me if it didn’t bother him. My son wet the bed until he was 9 and he was starting to feel pretty bad about it. I believe he was kind of semi-waking up when he had to go, but not completely waking up. Then a friend recommended these awesome alarm underwear. I was not entirely convinced, but thought I’d give it a try – I was spending that much in pull ups over the course of a year, so why not? Well, I like to call them magic underwear, because within a week he had stopped wetting the bed and we have never looked back!
    http://bedwettingstore.com/rodger-wireless-bedwetting-alarm.html?
    My son also bites his nails to the quick as well. So if you find a remedy for this one, please share!!!
    Good luck.

  • Tracey

    Man, I got nuthin’…

  • http://www.louisvuittonoutletpro.com Amelia

    my baby also do that everyday

  • Christine

    The night training.
    I waited in vain for the coveted dry PullUp every morning with Cam. I never got it.
    One night I didn’t put the PullUp on and he was dry all night. That was it.
    I believe he was peeing in the pull up because he could. As long as it was on, it got wet.
    When I took it off, he stayed dry.
    I wonder if Will’s nail biting is just an oral motor fixation. Cuy did this and when he was old enough we started letting him chew gum and the nail shredding stopped. He still bites his nails every now and then but its more of a self grooming thing. He keeps them short enough so I don’t have to clip them.

  • Christina

    My daughter has picked up her dads habits of holding the remote and now it’s in her effing mouth!!! She bites her nails and picks them too…I keep telling her, we can’t paint them if you chew them…doesn’t work…her finger is always up her nose and she hide when it goes in her mouth -gag!!!!
    Andrew has been potty trained in 2 weeks and the last two nights no diaper….BUT he doesn’t have anything to drink past 6:30 and bed time is 8pm…..wish I get get my other two to be so quick at learning there is a toilet here…so use the bloody thing at night…I have changed beds for them twice this week….arghhhh….
    The only thing I can say about the biting thing is a strict time out right after…and go and console the bitten child right away….Tell the biter to use your words to describe how you feel and if the mother sees there is going to be a confrontation and thinks a bite is going to occur than to separate the two or say “little Johnny tell him what you want or don’t want…use your words”. OMG I sound like a broken record player….in the end maybe the other brat did deserve the bite!!!! Yikes…did I say that out loud?

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