8 11/21/2012 life Friendship

Friendship

For my friend: you know who you are.

So you know those times, the ones where life is such a hard, hard struggle you just don’t know how you’re going to make it through? Those rough, tough times, when all you can do is get your Dory on and just keep swimming? 
I’m there, friends. 
I’m not going to go into the details because this story is not mine to tell. And besides…it’s personal and painful and I’m so full up from coping with it that I don’t even have the energy to talk about it anymore, let alone try to find le mot juste with pen and ink (or keyboard, as the case may be). 
But last week, when I was overflowing with grief and fear and feeling utterly, utterly lost and alone, I reached out to a friend. A good friend from work who I knew had been through her own emotional crucible, and who’d lived to tell the tale. I phoned her, and told her, and asked for advice. She gave it – freely and without judgement. 
And she told me this: 

We can only give from abundance.
And it was then, when she spoke that phrase that I knew it was time to take care of me, because if I didn’t, I wouldn’t be able to help the ones who really need me. 
But the most amazing thing? When I saw her the next day at work, she thanked me.
“Why?” I asked her.
“For being my friend”, she said.
And I realized, then and there, that being a good friend sometimes means being the one who needs help, instead of just being the one who gives it. It means asking for help, and it means letting people help you. Being a good friend sometimes means taking what is offered. Because those who are in abundance want to give, and we give back to them when we accept it.
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  • Kath

    Thanks Sara. I will.

  • Kath

    Thanks Jen. Your support means so much!

  • Kath

    Thank you! It’s great to know there’s support out there :)

  • Kath

    Thanks, Tracey. Sometimes it’s even hard to know you need help you get so enmeshed in just managing, yanno? But so great to find it when I finally asked.

  • Sara

    love. I love this post Kath. Hang in there. x

  • Jen

    I agree. You need to focus on you, at least somewhat, in order to give others what they need. You need to love yourself and believe you are worthy. You need to build your strength and know who you are in order to inspire others. As a wise friend of mine told me as he came out on the other side of a tough time, “What I learned is that I deserve to be cherished.” We should treat ourselves that way and expect nothing less from others.

  • FreshnLocal

    There are many, many people in your life who would love to help. And I am one of them. xo

  • Tracey

    Oh my darling woman… this is a terrific post.
    Keep on swimming, indeed. And ask for the help you need. And give from abundance – yes. Hold the ones who help fill you up very close to your heart… and float. xoxoxoxoxox

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